"Become aware of the agreements that dictate your reality and have the discipline to change them."
By "agreements," Ruiz means assumptions that each person has made regarding the nature of life and reality. He points out that not every conclusion is correct, despite how long you've held it or why you decided to believe in it. Accordingly, he argues for the continual challenge of ones assumptions because they determine how you engage in life.
"Be impeccable with your word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love. . ."
Ruiz believes in the power of the word. Arguing for truth and love, he emphasizes the necessity of sincerity. The speaker can cause trouble for himself or herself by not being reliable in speech.
"Don't make assumptions. Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life. . ."
In this book, Ruiz states that one of the four agreements which the individual must make with themself in order to become wise is not to make assumptions. He includes this one on a cautionary basis, as a means of preventing potential problems such as misunderstandings. He believes the easiest way to prevent an assumption is to ask more questions.
"Don't take anything personally. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering. . ."
With this agreement, Ruiz speaks to the culture of the 21st century. People easily become offended by other people's words and actions because they solopsistically assume that they, personally, are the center of the universe. The solopsist believes everyone acts upon inspiration of the actual solopsist. Ruiz presents the counterargument that perhaps this is not the case, that people are only motivated by their own internal worlds. If one views other people's actions as a response to the other's mind, then one is free to brush off any insult because it is merely a projection of the other's own pain.
