"I barely have time to see my grief clearly before the groundswell rises again, throbbing, foaming, breaking over me as if driven raving mad by my perplexity and determined to dismantle me, fiber by fiber, until I fall apart."
In this passage, Jaafari tries to come to terms with the fact his wife has committed a terrible crime. He feels incredibly betrayed and is shocked by her actions, as he believes she does not have any strong political beliefs. His life has been completely turned upside down by his wife’s actions, and he spends the rest of the text trying to get some closure.
"I just want to understand why the love of my life excluded me from hers, why the woman I was crazy about was more receptive to other men's sermons than she was to my poems,"
Here Jaafari is trying to come to terms with the fact that he was ignorant of a huge aspect of his wife’s inner life. He had no idea she had strong political beliefs and is therefore incredibly shocked when she becomes a suicide bomber. He wants to understand why she excluded him from this side of her, and why she was easily influenced by other people’s beliefs.
"The happiness you offered her smelled of decay. It repulsed her, you get it? She didn't want your happiness. She couldn't work on her suntan while her people were bent under the Zionist yoke.”
Here, Jaafari is being told that the life he offered his wife did not actually make her happy. Although he believed that she was neutral in her beliefs, she had strong political and religious opinions and was unhappy pretending that she didn’t. Although she enjoyed a relatively comfortable life, she wasn’t happy because she wasn’t making any political impact.
"A country of ghosts is what I'll have when all this is over. I need to know what happened, what went wrong."
This quote reflects Amin's determination to uncover the truth about his wife's involvement in the suicide bombing, despite the impending loss and isolation he feels. It underscores his relentless pursuit of answers and the emotional complexity of his character.
"Truth is the only weapon I possess."
This shows Dr. Amin Jaafari's unwavering commitment to seeking the truth. In the face of personal and societal turmoil caused by his wife's actions, Amin sees the pursuit of truth as his most potent tool. This quote symbolizes his moral resolve and determination to understand the motivations behind the suicide bombing, even when it leads to uncomfortable revelations. It underscores the central theme of truth-seeking as a driving force in the novel's narrative.
