Summary
The novel opens with Don's unconventional style of narration and approach to understanding life in a highly logical, methodical, and structured way. Don's friend, Gene, has asked Don to present a lecture on Asperger's Syndrome on his behalf. Don is irritated because this request will throw off his highly regimented and scheduled life, but Gene proposes that he will pay a cleaner to clean Don's bathroom so that Don will have free time to prepare and deliver the lecture. Gene is a professor who specializes in genetics but now works as the head of the Psychology Department. Gene and Don have been friends ever since Gene hired Don (who is also a geneticist) to work in the Department of Genetics, and Don has also developed a friendship with Gene's wife Claudia, who is a clinical psychologist. Gene and Claudia have an open marriage, and Gene is very dedicated to pursuing sexual relationships with other women. Don is also interested in finding a life partner, but he has always found it difficult to cultivate social and romantic relationships. He tends to be unable to read social cues or show emotional intelligence, and he fixates instead on completely logical approaches.
Currently, Gene and Claudia are Don's only friends. He briefly mentions that he was close with his deceased sister, and he also mentions another deceased friend, Daphne. Daphne was an elderly woman who moved into Don's apartment building after her husband moved into a retirement home. Don cooked dinner with Daphne, explained his work to her, and, on her birthday, brought her the same flowers that her husband had always brought her. Because of his kind and caring nature, Daphne commented that Don would make a good husband, and Don realized that it might be possible for him to eventually find a partner. However, Daphne eventually developed Alzheimer's disease and also moved to a retirement home.
On the night of the lecture, Don shows up with a carefully prepared presentation. His own specialization is researching genetic predispositions to liver diseases, but he is intrigued by what he has learned about Asperger's and other autism spectrum disorders. The audience for the lecture is a group of adolescents (presumably individuals with diagnoses of Asperger's) and their parents. Don is annoyed because the start of the lecture is delayed and the coordinator, an attractive woman named Julie, asks him to make the presentation less technical. Don begins to make the argument that symptoms associated with Asperger's (such as logic, focus, and the ability to think rationally rather than emotionally) are beneficial and often unfairly stigmatized simply because they do not fit with socially constructed expectations of "normal" behavior. The children become very enthusiastic and start chanting "Aspies rule!", leading the lecture to end in a chaotic fashion.
After the lecture, Julie invites Don to have a drink with her, but he declines because he does not want to disrupt his schedule any further. A few days later, Julie calls to invite him to dinner. Don takes her comment that she wants to hear more about Asperger's literally (when it is clear that Julie actually wants to go on a date with him), and his explanation leads him to realize that when someone wants to quickly identify individuals who possess certain traits, a screening questionnaire can be an effective methodology. Excitedly, he decides to launch the Wife Project: using a questionnaire to identify women who will likely be suitable partners for him. Don is eager to talk about this idea with Gene and Claudia, but they are often preoccupied with other tasks. In the meantime, Don is called to a meeting with the Dean because he has reported a student named Kevin Yu for engaging in plagiarism. The Dean explains that the situation is tricky because this is Kevin's third offense: according to university policy, he should be expelled, but the Dean is concerned about the negative impression this action will generate. Don is disgusted by what he sees as her lack of ethics.
Gene and Claudia eventually give Don some feedback on his questionnaire, suggesting that he might be being too rigid. Don makes a few minor revisions but perseveres in posting the form on several dating websites. While he waits for responses, he also attends a speed-dating event to attempt to meet some prospects in person. Don meets a woman named Olivia, whom he finds interesting and attractive, but who fails the questionnaire. Based on this, Don feels satisfied that the questionnaire will prevent him from being distracted by unsuitable candidates.
Analysis
The opening of the novel introduces many of the complexities and idiosyncrasies inherent in Don's character. Don is shown to have many positive characteristics. He is very intelligent and successful in his chosen field, and his friendship with Daphne shows that he has the capacity to be a kind and caring person. While Don's life is highly structured, it also seems to work for him: he is able to live as a high-achieving person and spend all of his time being productive and working towards his goals. Many people would actually envy Don for his discipline, focus, and ability to live his life exactly the way that he wants.
However, the first section also makes it clear that Don's lack of social awareness and tact can lead to tricky situations. It is important to note, however, that many people seem to find Don charming, even when chaotic situations erupt as a result of his choices. For example, Julie could understandably have been very angry with how Don managed the presentation on Asperger's, but she finds the situation comical and is even attracted to Don. This interaction between Don and Julie is important for several reasons. First, it signals to readers that Don must be fairly attractive and charismatic in spite of his eccentricities; Julie is presented as an attractive woman, and she freely chooses to pursue Don, even after his strange behavior. Second, the interaction functions as one of the novel's first examples of dramatic irony, wherein a reader is aware of some information that a character is unaware of. A reader can tell that Julie wants to go on a date with Don (and is not actually interested in neurodiversity), but Don's tendency to interpret everything literally means that he misses out on that implied meaning.
In spite of the many functional and successful aspects of his life, Don is clearly lonely and craves romantic companionship. Both of his recent close friends (Gene and Daphne) are or were married, and so Don is likely influenced by what he observes about their lives. Because many aspects of social and interpersonal relationships don't make sense to Don, he often relies on careful observation and analysis to gauge how he should be conducting himself. Don would surely have noticed that many well-educated and financially stable adults would form long-term partnerships in their twenties or thirties, and he would likely think he should follow the same pattern of behavior. Don's interactions with Daphne also show that he has the capacity to be caring, attentive, and reliable. This interaction actually hints that once Don is established in a relationship, he will function well: for him, the challenge will come from finding and wooing a woman.
Don's approach to finding a prospective mate is a comical extension of his tendency to be highly logical and analytical. While the somewhat cold and clinical approach might seem jarring at first, the use of the questionnaire is in some ways an extension of the matchmaking practices that have often been popular in different cultures and time periods. It is also not so far removed from many contemporary online dating practices. While the questionnaire might actually be a useful tool for identifying compatible partners (especially given that Don is looking for a long-term partner, not anything casual), the rigidity that Don brings to the process seems likely to limit him. Don's desire for efficiency and control means that he isn't willing to be curious or open about women who seem promising. Simsion, interestingly, portrays women as willing to participate in Don's project, and fairly unquestioning of it. Given that Don seems to be a desirable partner, these women might be willing to overlook a strange process—or they may like that it signals a clear and unambiguous willingness to commit.
Don's awkward but utterly transparent approach to romance and dating is juxtaposed against Gene's approach. Gene is also clearly charming since he is able to seduce a wide variety of women, but the novel hints from the beginning that Gene is quite selfish and sometimes engages in ethically questionable behavior. Gene's "project" of sleeping with one woman from every country is just as cold and calculating as Don's Wife Project—actually more so, because Don has sincerely good intentions to find one special woman, commit to her, and then strive to be a good partner. Don's questionnaire is somewhat objectifying, but it does consider a wide range of personal interests, preferences, and personality types. Gene's approach reduces a woman to a stereotypical representation of a particular country and seems to signal no interest in her personality or history. Unlike Don, Gene represents a character trope that Sally Dalton-Brown describes as often being present in novels set on university campuses: the professor who is "rarely a leader or inspirational teacher, as one might expect, but is very often depicted as a fool, fraud, or philanderer imprisoned within a politically claustrophobic institution, an environment that almost appears to encourage foolishness, fakery, and philandering" (pg. 591).
In many ways, Don and Gene's friendship shows two opposites balancing each other out. Don's integrity and honesty function as a moral counterweight for Gene, while Gene's ability to manage complex and subtle interpersonal dynamics makes him a useful tutor to Gene. The complementary balance between them foreshadows Don's eventual romantic relationship with Rosie, who will likewise be a surprising but positive balance.
