Romance
The main theme of the novel is romance; the main character, Kim Rossi, wants to be a romantic fiction writer and the majority of the plot revolves around the romantic fiction writing conference that she is attending. Romance is studied from all perspectives; Kim has actually had three incredibly unsuccessful romances, having been left at the altar, dumped after an engagement and married to a history professor whose grades for sexual favors with his female students made the national news. Her fellow writer, Zeke, is also a closet romantic and deeply loves his wife whom he tells Kim has left him. Kim also tries to inject fresh romance onto her father's life by encouraging him to date a woman he has met at the Veteran's hospital, but he is really still in love with Kim's late mother.
Romance is always viewed in a favorable light throughout the book and the settings are all very romantic, such as the rustic inn in snowy Vermont, or pre-Christmas New York City.
Depression and Suicide
Kim's mother committed suicide when Kim was eleven years old, after many unsuccessful attempts as Kim was growing up. Having suffered from mild depression most of her adult life, she was able to cope with it until she gave birth to Kim, when hormonal changes triggered a downward spiral that she seemed unable to find her way back from. To Kim, if seemed as if her mother had been selfish and left them but to Kim's father it was a tragic loss of a woman who had valiantly battled depression and loved both himself and his daughter dearly.
Zeke became suicidal after the death of his wife and unborn child during his wife's pregnancy. He became more and more depressed until he was unable to function on a day to day basis, also turning to alcohol to self-medicate. If his housecleaner had not found him, he would have died after overdosing on painkillers.
the author takes trouble to explain the symptoms of depression and the way in which it changes the ability of the mind to think rationally, and explores the guilt faced by the relatives of the person who has committed suicide who on some level believe they could have done something to save them.
Veteran's Healthcare
Throughout the book we are shown that the healthcare offered to veterans with their insurance is woefully inadequate and that having sacrificed themselves for the country they deserve much better. Kim's father has a great chance of bearing cancer with surgery but has to wait so long for the actual procedure that the cancer could spread elsewhere in his body; however the program is so underfunded and the demand so great that this is the best the Veterans' Hospital is able to offer. Through his friends who join them for Thanksgiving, the reader also learns more about the challenges facing combat-wounded veterans after they return home.
Christmas
The book is Christmas themed from its title onwards, primarily because it takes place over the holiday season but also because of the Christmas-y nature of the surroundings. The location for the writing conference is The Mistletoe Inn and attendance at the conference is Kim's Christmas gift from her father. The scenery is always Christmas-y and Zeke and Kim's trip to Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, is filled with Christmas markets and food; the name of the city also reminds us of Bethlehem and the very first Christmas.
Abandoment
Abandonment is a theme of the Mistletoe Inn. Kim has suffered many losses in her life. She feels that her mother abandoned her and her father when she committed suicide. Her first fiancé left her at the altar. Her second fiancé dumps her by text message to join a professional basketball team. Then once she does marry her husband leaves her for two college students. This leads her to feel that all this abandonment is her fault and that there is something wrong with her. Kim is slowly getting her life back together after her divorce. When she meets Zeke, she is attracted to him and ends up falling in love. When he admits to her that he attempted suicide after the death of his wife, Kim’s feelings of abandonment overwhelm her. She cannot see him as someone she can trust because she believes he will attempt suicide again and leave her alone. Kim runs away from him because of this fear and almost loses her chance at happiness because of it.
External Validation
External Validation is a theme of the novel. Kim seeks external validation because she feels that she is not worthy of love, happiness or success. The death of her mother left her feeling that she was not loved. She seeks love from others leading to a succession of fiancés who end up abandoning her. This validation leads her to marry a man many years her senior, a professor at her college. Kim is devastated at the writer’s conference when Zeke criticizes her work. She sees the criticism of her book as a criticism of her. She must come to terms with her need for external validation and learn that her sense of self-worth is not tied to what others think of her. Her past experiences have affected her self-esteem, and she must get past these feelings of rejection and abandonment to become happy and successful in her life.
Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a theme of the novel. The death of Kim’s mother affects her greatly. She blames her mother for leaving her. She doesn’t understand how her mother has struggled with mental illness throughout her life and how much she fought to get well. To move on with her life, Kim needs to forgive her mother for taking her life and come to terms on how her mother’s dead affected how she views the relationships in her life. Her father tells Kim how her mother struggled and how much strength she had to try to keep from succumbing to her depression. This helps Kim to understand why her mother died and how much she loved her daughter. Kim is able to forgive her mother and begin living her life.
