High-beams
The first thing Conrad notices when he meets with his therapist are his eyes, blue and piercing. Conrad compares the doctor’s eyes with high-beams that can see and discover everything. The comparison in this context has the purpose of highlighting the idea that Conrad feels exposed by the doctor and that he feels like his darkest secrets are revealed under the doctor’s watchful eyes.
Metaphor for failure
Another important element in the novel is the scar Conrad has on his arm as a result of his suicide attempt. Cal looks at the scar when he goes to check on his son and finds him sleeping at his desk. For Cal, the scar is a metaphor for failure as it proves that he was not good enough to help his son and that he failed as a father.
Just like a flake
In the tenth chapter, the author presents a conversion between Conrad’s friends, discussing Conrad. While the rest of the team thinks is a good idea to exclude Conrad from their activities, Lazenby insists that they invite Conrad to go with them to the movies. When Lazenby finishes talking, one of the boys in the group compares Conrad with a flake, highlighting the idea that they do not have enough time to deal with someone so fragile. This proves that for them, Conrad is more like a burden that a friend they would be willing to take care of.
Metaphor for release
After Conrad quits the swimming team, he returns home and decides to masturbate. While Conrad is a teenage boy and while masturbating is a common practice among teenagers, the first time the action is linked with Conrad is in the tenth chapter. His action suggests release, both from sexual tension and from psychological tension. The act of masturbation takes place almost immediately after Conrad quit from his swimming team, a decision that made him feel more relaxed since the swimming team only made him feel uncomfortable and incapable. Thus, the act of masturbation is an important metaphor that signals that fact that Conrad began taking actions for his own good and that he stopped caring what the others though about him and the decisions he took.
Just like skiing
When Conrad talks about the encounter he had with the beautiful woman in the library’s parking lot, the doctor urges Conrad to think about starting a relationship with a girl he knows. Conrad expresses his fears, thinking that starting a relationship will not benefit him and that the process will be a hard and complicated one. To encourage him, the doctor compares relationships with skiing, a sport Conrad was familiar with. By offering this comparison, Conrad is able to associate a sport he knows with an element still foreign to him and thus he feels more encouraged to start a relationship and to take some risks in his life.
