Doughnut Lover
A guy named Rollo is known for his absolute love of eating doughnuts. When the time comes to put a hit on him, he is the victim of the most ironic death possible. Blasting caps are put inside a Boston Creme Pie-style doughnut. The explosion succeeds in decapitating him because Rollo could not control his love of sweet pastry.
Polar Bear
The narrator writes of squeezing the trigger on his gun three times. The bullets create an almost perfect triangle of holes in the chest of a polar bear that seems on the verge of attacking him. Despite this, the assault of bullets seems to have no effect on the bear whatever. The irony is that the narrator faces a great danger from the wrath of the female taxidermist who is angry at him for shooting the bear she stuffed than he faced from the polar bear itself.
Mom's Boy
This is the violent story of a hit man narrated by a hired killer. Nevertheless, the narrator gives in to the constant request by his mother to stay in touch. The scenes of gruesome violent confrontations are ironically juxtaposed against loving phone calls from the hit man to his mother.
Military Training
The U.S. military branches don't advertise themselves as schools for creating killing machines. They instead tell potential recruits to not think about dying on foreign lands. Rather, they push the idea of learning a trade that can be used to get a good paying in the real world. The narrator suggests the irony of this disconnect between advertising and reality when he writes "The army hadn't really paved the way for legitimate employment on the outside" in reference to medals for marksmanship.
"Braille Scream"
Bullet holes in an SUV windshield resemble the little dots that comprise the Braille form of the written word so that vision-impaired people can read. The narrator refers to this sight as a "Braille scream." It is ironic because it is a form of any language that exists only in tactile form and thus cannot actually produce a sound like a scream.
