Dalton Conley's memoir is an autobiographical account of him growing up as a member of the minority. At three years old, he desperately wants a sister, so he decides to "kidnap" a black baby--who his mother quickly returns. The girl turns out to be the daughter of separatists who live in the same house and are later hunted by the FBI. Shortly after, however, his wish is granted, and his baby sister is born. With his parents being artists with little money, he grows up in a federal housing project in the Lower East Side, Manhattan, surrounded by violence and drug-related crime, which is why his mother imposes strict rules on him and his sister. However, as several accounts throughout the story testify, these rules do not always prevent Dalton from experiencing violence.
Even though he and his sister are the only white kids in the black and Hispanic neighborhood, he is at first oblivious to the concept of race. This changes in nursery school when dolls of various skin colors are handed out, but all the kids just want the white version.
Throughout his academic career, he learns more about segregation and white privilege. For example, at Public School 4 (or 'Mini School,' as he calls it) he is the only white boy in a classroom full of black students. However, even though he shows the same mischievous behavior, he does not receive any corporal punishment like the others, which makes him uncomfortable. He switches to the Chinese class before moving to another school in a middle-class district, where he learns that students there are segregated by class, not race. To blend in, he quickly starts to imitate how the other students speak. This new understanding of class leads to a feeling of superiority over the project kids at home, but also to a feeling of shame, so he does not want to invite his friends for sleepovers after seeing their luxurious homes. When he finally does invite his friend Michael, who quickly makes friends with the project kids due to his knowledge of electronics, Dalton feels outdone in his own neighborhood.
Dalton soon learns that apart from class, he needs money to keep up with the consumerist attitude of his classmates and be part of their group. At first, he uses his emergency money to buy fast food and comic books, but soon he resorts to shoplifting. He later confesses his crimes to his mother, who makes him pay off his debt by doing chores around the house. Dalton likes the feeling of getting paid, so he takes a part-time job at a local candy store until his school principal informs his parents about his child labor. His mother, supporting the efforts of her son and ignoring the principal's opinion, soon finds another job for Dalton.
Every summer, the Conleys spend their holiday in Pennsylvania, where the people are not used to the children's swear words or the fathers love for loud music. Even though the people in the neighborhood are friendly, Dalton and his sister observe various forms of racism.
After his mother has managed to sell her manuscript, Dalton's family has enough money for a trip to Colombia, where he experiences a different kind of poverty. Later, his father takes up a job at Time magazine, which contributes to the improvement of the family's financial situation.
In 7th grade, Dalton meets his new best friend Jerome, who he convinces to hang out at a store instead of going to school. Dalton's addiction to video games is so severe that he forges his father's signature on his report cards, and even steals money from his family to be able to play at the arcade. Eventually, however, his mother finds out about his behavior, which leaves her extremely disappointed.
Just when he begins to struggle with puberty, Jerome is shot in the neck and therefore paralyzed. Following this incident, Dalton develops ticks and obsessive-compulsive disorder, e.g., keeping everything symmetrical, particularly kissing people twice to protect them from any harm.
This obsession with symmetry leads to a fire in the apartment of Raphael, Dalton's new Latino friend, when they play a game that involves throwing burning matches. Leaving out the crucial detail that it was his match that caused the blaze, the fire is declared an accident. Dalton reflects that this resolution is only possible for people of the white race like himself and people of a high status like Raphael's parents.
Eventually, after shortly contemplating moving to Rosevelt island, the family moves to a middle-class apartment on the West Side, courtesy of a new government program subsidizing artists. However, when he overhears a conversation among potential friends calling him socially awkward, he realizes that being accepted is not just a matter of race or class, but personality as well.
