Epicene, or the Silent Woman begins with Dauphine Eugenie telling his friend Truewit that his uncle, Morose, has decided to marry and have a child, just because he does not want his nephew to inherit his fortune. Dauphine also explains that his uncle has heard of a woman, Epicene, from his barber, Cutbeard. Morose is intent on marrying her because of what he deems a most important quality: she is silent.
Morose is a very particular man; he does not like any noise at all and has moved to a house on a street so narrow that barely anyone can go through, so he avoids all noise from the outside. He makes his servants address him through signs or gestures, while he himself is very talkative (as he mentions incessantly how and why he values silence).
Truewit, feeling sorry for his friend and thinking that the greedy man must be stopped, goes to visit him and gives him lengthy reasons not to marry. He mentions all the terrible consequences that will befall him if he weds, and Morose appears to be worried about the claims.
However, Truewit is dismayed when he learns that Epicene was in fact “planted” in Cutbeard’s house by Dauphine himself, as he is planning something mischievous to make sure his uncle grants him his inheritance. Cutbeard promptly arrives and lets them know that Morose suspected Truewit was acting on Dauphine’s behalf and, upon meeting Epicene and finding her quiet and submissive, agreed to marry her immediately.
Epicene and Morose are married, and after the vows are spoken, Epicene reveals she is loud, opinionated, and very bossy.
At the same time, to celebrate the party, two subplots emerge: a party is organized at Morose’s house (about which Morose knows nothing and which causes him immediate distress because of the noise). Among the invited guests are the Ladies Collegiates, a group of women who get together to discuss philosophical issues and take a liking to Dauphine, flirting with him and arguing among themselves; also invited to the party are John Daw and Amorous La Foole, two knights who always try to show off and act like they are smarter than they are, but who speak of Latin texts erroneously and are not so intelligent.
Truewit decides to make fools of Daw and La Foole, and he tricks them into believing the other wants to fight, which leads to them giving up their swords as they become afraid of an actual confrontation and apparently get over their competitive nature.
As the party progresses and Morose grows increasingly dismayed at the loud interactions and celebrations he suffers through, Dauphine offers an out: he will help him get a divorce (or annulment) if he reinstates his inheritance. Desperate, Morose agrees.
Truewit has Cutbeard and Captain Otter (two friends who were in on the deceit), wear costumes and act as a lawyer and a divine, which leads Morose to confess in front of the Ladies Collegiate and everyone at the party that he is unable to perform his marital duties. After Morose signs a contract stating that he will reinstate Dauphine’s inheritance, Dauphine confesses that Epicene was in fact a boy, rendering the marriage null, and that Clerimont and Captain Otter were the two professionals in disguise. All the characters exit the stage while Truewit gives a speech condemning La Foole and Daw’s claims that they had slept with Epicene. He invites the audience to clap with a playful nod toward Morose's displeasure over more noise.
