Loneliness
In the memoir, O'Faolain is extremely candid as speaks on the struggles in her childhood, youth, and middle-age. She expresses the sense of loneliness she felt in her earlier years and still feels in her advanced age too. The book charts her troubled childhood due to an alcoholic parent and a father who was not available most of the time. Furthermore being one of nine siblings posed a sense of alienation from a young age which she further felt as a successful woman in a male-dominated field. In her adult years, she speaks on her sexual escapades, affairs, and failed attempts at love and relationships. Therefore, expresses how loneliness lingered even though she thrived career-wise and in social interactions. Moreover, she talks about the hardships of not being seen as a sexually viable individual when a woman reaches a certain age. Even though she still desires and quests for the same thrill and escapades from her youth, as a single older woman it becomes tougher. Thus, she delves on the freeing yet lonely feeling of being single and childless at that age where her peers conformed to the marriage convention.
Contentment
O'Faolain’s memoir charts her pursuit from childhood to have a fulfilling life even if it meant subverting societal expectations or going against the grain. Therefore her life is one of several regrets yet rewarding, accomplished, and adventurous. In her youth, she had to seek her ‘own kind’, individuals who shared her passion for literature, to feel content and accepted. Most of the stories entail O’Faolain interacting with renowned artists, writers, and journalists from the 20th century. As a middle-aged Irish woman, she acknowledges the rewarding nature of her choices as she accomplished her dreams in her field. Yet she also admits the ramifications of her choices like indulging in destructive patterns and sexual relationships with married men. She aimed to seek contentment in her passion for literature, from literary circles, and spinsterhood.
Liberation and Self-Actualization
In essence, the memoir is about an intelligent woman navigating a patriarchal society in a male-dominated career field. She grew up in the 1950’s Ireland when societal expectations of women were limited and misogynistic at most. Therefore, O’Faolain’s story is one of female liberation before the women’s movement made great strides in workplace rights. Growing up as an intelligent woman with ambitions, society did not work in her favor for she occasionally stumbled in her quest. She also acknowledges that she dependably relied on men for her happiness even though she was aware of this sexist dynamic. Thus, took responsibility on her part to liberate herself from such shackles and go through self-discovery and actualization. She also charts the changing roles of women in society in her career years as she chronicles her own personal journey.
