What is the author's message about family?

At the very end of the novel, when Jing-mei meets her sisters, at moment when Jing-mei, on behalf of all the characters, understands the point about shared spirit that Tan's reader has been seeing all along. They cannot escape one another, because in many ways they "are" one another. In uniting with her sisters in the flesh, Jing-mei fulfills more than just her mother's wish to be reunited with her sisters in spirit. She has also fulfilled Suyuan's other deep wish, to have Jing-mei understand her and to be able to pass on her legacy. Their meeting is the ultimate affirmation of Tan's continual theme: mothers and daughters in all generations are different 'translations' of the same capable, compassionate and unbreakable spirit.