What does the child learn in the poem?

I think the child learns a few things. He discovers the impermanence of life: his young brother tragically killed by a car. He also discovers how mourning is handled in different ways. Heaney’s poem is a portrait of the reality that there is no “right” way to mourn. As stated, the older brother telling the story does not seem emotionally invested in the unexpected death of his brother at all. Then there is the gender subversion of his parents: it is the father who is weeping uncontrollably while the mother is the one responding not with tears of sadness of sighs of barely contained anger at the loss of her baby boy.